Suicide

 It's a real choice.

I choose life every day.

I have to.

I face this decision every single day.

Every.

Single.

Day.

Some face a lack of love for the self and seek that from someone else.

When they are denied that love, it's like denying life. They choose death.

Some face a lack of love from their environment.

When they are denied that love, it's like living in solitary confinement.

We all know that's a death sentence to anyone.

So they choose death.

Some experience a guilt so strong it convinces them they do not belong.

They do not deserve to exist here. I don't deserve to exist because I'm a mistake.

My parents did not plan to conceive me. I was worse than an "accident" that we tried to correct.

I was a complete failure and disappointment and they should have had an abortion.

So they choose death.

Sometimes, during the day or the night, you just feel like you want to logout for a while and take a break.

You think you can come back, but it's like Spa Castle -- once you're checked out, you're done and need

to pay the tariff to get back in.

I know I'm strange. I know I'm weird. I know I'm socially "unacceptable".

I know nobody finds anything I do useful.

I am painfully aware of just how few people know me and care about me.

Nobody finds me useful at my job either. That's why I've always been a grunt worker tending to the

technical scraps rather than working with and trying to understand people better.

I don't fit into any of your social groups.

I don't have a place where I belong.

Yet I exist.

I don't belong to any "crew" or "cult" or "group" -- it's all the same.

To choose one is to unchoose another and because of your choices, people will judge you and hate you

for those choices. They don't know who you really are, so they can't even really hate you. However

far too many of us are stuck in this idea that your experiences and emotions are your reality when

they are just a projection of your reality. If you are brave enough to look beyond the veil, you'll

see others are watching you in this life. Not with their eyes, but with their souls. Creation is

everywhere if you know how to look.

I believe in Right To Life. No, I'm not talking about the birth aspect of this either. I'm talking

about the decision we make every day after that birth. The choice we make to continue going along

with this clown show of a life. Where people hate on each other, tear each other down, spread negativity,

fear, and try to control you by telling you that you will die unless you buy my product, link in the

description below. Get your free air before they start taxing you on that too!

What do we do after we are born and how do we carry ourselves?

I doubt humanity has taken a collective moment to think about this seriously.

Perhaps it has and I have just been left out of that conversation.

Personal conduct seems to have fallen on deaf ears.

The idea that being a decent human being is not only possible but an implicit obligation by all.

Not as an individual, but as a collective. How do we evolve and grow our "mob mentality".

Ever notice how when you're in a group, you implicitly get "dumber" -- that's essential parts of your

brain shutting down to preserve your body. Ignore them. Maintain your mind. Your consciousness that

is the result of your weakness here.

I believe in the Right to Life in that we all have the right to be here. We all have the right to

continue on. It should not be a privilege to exist here. The privilege was granted enough with

your birth here.

Now that you are here, it's your obligation and desire to become the best version of you that you can

find and show that to the world. Now is the time for you to evolve and grow into your higher self

as a collective, not just an individual. Start as an individual and grow as a collective.

That Right To Life here should be a shining example of why you continue on.

I ask myself that question every day: Why else do I continue on?

What is my incentive to be here?

It's more than "What's my purpose?" -- your purpose is what you make of it and live it.

Choose what you want in life and just do it. That's your purpose. To be your higher authentic self.

My incentive to be here is my friends, my lovers, my family. The experiences I am granted every day

and the choices I have and make that navigate me through this life.

I understand now more of my power, my ability to change; and capacity, my sheer volume of love that

I know I can provide. Not just a moment. Not just a passion. Not just a trick.

I know I can love profoundly, deeply. I know I can love over time. I know that love is not limited to just one.

I know that grief is the price we pay for love.

I know that pain is a part of love.

I strive to carry myself with my personal conduct.

I strive to better my morals every day. I learn with every experience.

I try to be the best version of myself every single day.

I try to love to the capacity that I can and exercise this muscle every day to make it stronger.

Strong as my intelligence. Strong as my muscles. Strong as my capacity to hold on to my tenacity.

Why else am I here?

Choose Love.

Choose Intelligence.

Choose to be aware rather than ignorant.

Nobody knows everything.

When you do, it's time to hang it up.

You will always be a student of the Universe.

You will always be a child in the eyes of someone else.

Let that inner child thrive.

Apologize for the past oblivion you gave and the denial this child had before.

Embrace that inner child with a huge hug, tell him or her that you love them and heal those broken wounds.

Acknowledge your existence.

Learn to love yourself.

When you do this for yourself, you do this for the collective, you add to humanity with your love.

I look forward to the day we have an abundance of love as a species rather than hate, hurt, pain, misery

and self-torture.

Choose Love.

Choose Life.