Raising a Daddy

Having a daddy sometimes is like raising a kid. I've met my fair share of 50 and 60 year old 5 and 6 year olds. There are plenty of people out there who simply have not taken the time to ponder and learn about The Self and as a result are the younger seeming versions of themsevles despite their bodies senescing (or the act of aging).

Childlike State of Permanence

There are many people who interpret their current state of being to be the entire definition of the universe ever. They seem to completely lose the context of the fact that they have lived longer than the last hour of the day. They have zero memory of the past unless you ask about it. Even then, it's associated with things done and seen rather than felt or experienced. This is not a "person" it is a "state of being" in that we all have moments where we don't think rationally. I would like to say that you reach a point where those emotions never bother you any longer, but that depends on how you conduct yourself with them and your relationship with your emotions.

"Unfinished Business"

Many of us have past trauama that we have either yet to heal or refuse to address. How many of us have truly spent the time to reflect on that crying inner child and given them a real hug to make them feel better? How many of us have tried to raise that inner child to a maturity level that matches your physical age, at least? How many of us are in rebellion of our past and refuse to accept our present, let alone our future?

How many of us have spent how many years ruminating about something we can't change and have no control over?

It's all in how much of your baggage you wish to carry. How much of you do you want to unpack and explore vs keep wrapped up holding back your full potential? You can't carry your past baggage if you want to move into the future. All those experiences are lessons to be used to help propel you into the future. Use your pain as your fuel for your rocket ship that will take off once you have enough of this world figured out for yourself.

Personal Ego

Many of us have yet to let go of our Ego. Many of us think that we are our Ego and don't realize that we really do have a physical part of the brain that is responsibile for determine who "you" are and needs something to reflect upon to realize that we are in danger. It's called the lymbic system. You are not your lymbic system. You are a greater intelligence that is capable of more than just primitive survival. Ego is responsible for survival. Not all situations mean that one is being attacked. Ego is just how much of other things have you identified with your "self-map" and are thinking you need to protect. Once you realize this, you can tame the idea of someone attacking something about you or around you, but not actually you. Then, you get to look like the cool guy that doesn't flinch when a knife is thrown at him and he's on the target board.

Learning New Things

You are never too old to learn!

So I find it hard to understand this idea that once you turn 18 and don't need to goto the classroom anymore, that means you know everything and can do whatever you want for the rest of your life with all the learning you got growing up. There were so many people I came across that framed things from the perspective of "well, he's an adult, he should be able to do that, right?"

Can you really practice what you preach, there darlin`?

How someone managed to arrive at a point in their life where they are well into their years (say 40, 50, 60) and still not know things you would think are basic and that everybody should know. Knowing that this is a reality that exists allows me to understand that you never stop learning and it's impossible to know everything you should know because nobody's put the "Everything You Need To Know by ${X} Years Old" in a single book and make it a requirement that every single human being read that book so we can all start from that baseline. The issue is if someone does that, then you've basically created the modern day Bible (not necessarily the Christian-based one) and then peoeple will make up all kinds of reasons why you should not do what they say in this book. Even then, if we had a community driven style of identifying truth, then ideally, we'd all be able to see what was truth, who claimed it as truth, who affirmed it, who refuted it, the reasoning and the details behind that data and aggregate a collective decision (each of us can read the raw data ourselves to understand) as to what is truth and what is just a claim or assertion against a truth.

With this system, we can also see how it develops over time. We can also more clearly see that our truth is defined over time and it changes and evolves along with us. Things at times in our lives become important to us at certain times in our lives and then at some point those needs change. 

"Every Man Needs These 3 Things in his Retirement"

I heard someone once tell me that a man needs 3 things in retirement:

- A fully funded retirement plan.

- A house that's fully paid.

- A young man to take care of them.

I've also heard how often times in the gay community, we don't have to adhere to the same shapes of families that heteronormal families take. So, a man can find a daddy, take care of him until the end of his days and when the man grows old himself, a young man can take care of him and the cycle can go on.

Personally, I feel like the token couple relationship is just so cruel -- how you going to leave your partner here alone by themselves for who knows how many years after your passing (either one of you)??? At least with this other shape -- a man can enjoy a second life if he so choose. Nobody dies alone.

Also -- in this shape, the men can build generational wealth in their own way. If done correctly, that can really catch some traction if managed correctly. A family of men can come to support the community in ways never seen before. 

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These are just some musings around some of my experiences with this. I feel like I have truly helped someone when I can see them learn and grow. Recently, I have been really tuned to emotional growth and seeing people understand the fundamentals of personal conduct. This has taught me so much about how to treat people. I have changed the way I treat myself and now I experience emotions so much more differently than before. They are a data point. They are an indication that something is important to me or something I hold close to me. I have learned a few things about how to navigate around some of them. In learning about me, I learn about others -- to the point they think I'm psychic 😂 I feel like learning about me has also allowed others to read me more easily. I now give off that "he got his shyt together" vibe. 😎 I'm proud of what I have created within me.